Workbook -Self talk

Q1.1 Focus on the following ways you could talk to yourself as mentioned below, as if you really believe it and it is true. How does this make you feel?

I am hopeless and useless

Nobody loves me

Everyone avoids my company

I can never get anything right.

People always use me and then walk over me.

This world is full of things that are going wrong and we are doomed.”

Q1.2 Now focus on the thought below as if you really believe it and it is true. Observe how your feelings shift when you think this.

I am good enough.

Whatever is happening is perfect for me, even if I cannot see it now.

I will figure it out.

I am lovable, I am loved.

I am loving and caring.

The universe has my back.

Q1.3 Would the general nature of your thoughts be along the lines of the first question (1.1) or the second (1.2)

Q1.6 Does your self talk contribute positively to your wellbeing? Does it empower you to do or feel better? Or does it make you feel criticised and take away motivation?

Q1.4 Observe the following:

1. What do you tell yourself

   1. When you fail at something?

   2. When you are laughed at?

   3. When someone doesn't acknowledge you?

   4. When someone criticises you?

2. What do you tell others who are in a similar situation? Are you kinder to others than yourself?

3. If you are harsh with yourself, are you using it as a tool for self improvement or to belittle and loathe yourself?

Q1.7 Would you benefit from making a change in the way you tell yourself something?

Q1. 8 If it was input from any other source than yourself would you put up with it or tolerate the presence of the person?

Q1.9 Think about what kind of a person would spend a lot of time with. For the amount of time that you spend with yourself, can you be that ideal person?

Q1.9 Keep note of how much time you engage in self-talk vis-a-vis how much time is spent in the company of others.

Q2.0 How often do you not believe someone when they compliment you, because your own opinion of yourself is to the contrary?

Q2.1 How often do you feel comfortable with who you are being and what you are doing, even if others are critical of you?

Q2.2 Are your expectations of yourself fair or unfair, practical or unrealistic?

Q2.3 Do you expect to be appreciated by all people, at all times, under all circumstances? If that doesn't happen, what is your reaction? How do you talk to yourself when you are criticised?

Q2.4 Do you push yourself to be perfect? If yes, do you have a clearly defined target? Are your expectations realistic? When something is not perfect as per your expectation, does it push you to do better, or does it make you give up or become low?

Activity

Imagine being a fly on the wall and observing your own life. What would you like to tell yourself?